This past week

Mostly selfie & boyzz

I don't even know anymore 

My queen

I've never met a woman as beautifully effortless as my grandmother in front of the camera. It's the way she doesn't acknowledge my presence when I photograph her, allowing me to catch her in all her moments in between each private thought. She's beautiful and she's strong, yet vulnerable and all feeling. She is my muse, a goddess, and my queen.

Pattern Drawings

 Blue 

RGB

 Micro-Cubes

Repurpose Cubes

Paintings on Discarded Magazine Pages

 The Kennedys

 John Addams

 Ronal Washington

 Pixelated at Guantanamo Bay 

 Bill Cosby with White Face

Forced Smile Extras 

Red Eye

The boy who stole my thunder

Roscoe wears my scarf better than me ~__~

No. 1-15159

 No. 1-4372

 No. 4372-9649

 No. 9649-15159

No. 1-15159

This is how I manifest absurdity into a drawing. Unfortunately, this was a means to procrastinate applying for grad schools. It hurts my head how awful I've been with being mindful with managing time, but if I'm making work while I procrastinate, I've talked myself into thinking I'm still being productive in one thing, even though I know I am highly disregarding the hierarchy of priority. In the end, I am left with a little bit of guilt and a little bit of satisfaction. My behavior is so ridiculously contradicting... I can concentrate for long periods of time, and be highly meticulous and fastidious with the most intensive tedium of processes, but stubbornly, it has to be on my own terms. It makes me selfish, unreliable, and downright dumb. I just want to make work, stay in my studio for all hours of the day, but the world requires so much more, and to get to the point, there's a lot that needs to get done.... Artists are required to do other things than make art to get to the place they want to be.  In an ideal world, I can live just making art and nothing else, but *sigh* life is full of senseless activities. Everyday I imagine a life where people did what made them happy all the time. That would cut out a great extension of suffering and misery, but that's not the world we live in, and I am not in a dream. I can't fight it forever or else I'll stay inside too long. Must get back to thinking about doing what I'm suppose to do.